Scales: The Insane Mermaid Movie Nobody Asked For 

HA

If the birth mom wanted to protect her daughter from hunters, then WHY DID SHE NAME HER DAUGHTER *SIREN*

I love how “my bones are getting squishy” has become an inside joke throughout other videos on his channel

How the heck do you make a "pure mermaid breed" if there are NO MALE MERMAIDS?

“Your body is made up of 65% water” I really thought she was about to start bloodbending him

Turns out Siren was the best name for her all along. That's foreshadowing on her being a ruthless killer.

"Your body is made up of 65% water" I thought she would immobilize him blood bending style, but nah she straight killed him with no hesitation 💀

Adam's dad: lets not kill mermaids anymore Creepy guy: *years of academy training wasted*

Siren's mom: I want to protect her from hunters. No one must know shes a mermaid. Let me send her to land, where hunters live, and name her Siren. totally inconspicuous

This movie is clearly an allegory for puberty. We all remember puberty when we'd change and those effects would last forever and our legs would fuse together into one giant tail and we'd kill people. Just turn them into nothingness. Disintegrate them. Fond memories.

I feel like if this weren't a kid's film, this could easily be an intense horror-thriller allegory about a kid experiencing bodily changes as they begin to learn about and experience firsthand the dark side of the grown-ups who have no problem exploiting others for personal gain, regardless of age.

You know exactly what this movie script sounds like? Any kid playing with their dolls 😂

I love how Siren goes like "Ugh, fine, I guess I'll be nice and save this poor kid with a critical disease"

This movie is literally like a 10-year-old's fanfiction with a self-insert

Danny: thinks it's weird that the girl is named Siren and she's a mermaid People named Guy: **sweats nervously**

I know I'm late, but I think in Japanese mythology, mermaid blood can make you immortal. That's probably where they got it from.

Honestly I’d love a mermaid movie where the main character discovers them and IS NOT a mermaid.

I use a mermaid tail sometimes to swim in pools for fun and recently I was in San Diego and staying at my grandma's beach house I thought "maybe I should try taking photos in the ocean" and holy shit was that a mistake. I came home covered in red marks from being smacked up against the sand over and over and I could barely stand up to keep myself from getting hit by waves. Props to the actress playing Siren (and her stunt double) for probably having to do like fifty takes of flopping around in the waves.

"Every mermaid has a unique wail" whilst everyone is "wailing" the same tune

She took that "How to act like a mermaid" wikihow way too seriously.

I really feel like the lady who played Siren's adopted mom was leagues above the majority of the rest of this cast acting-wise. She seemed into it. So did that one blonde lady who told the hunters to take her instead.

Her finding out that she is a mermaid and thinking that controlling water must also be normal has the same energy as Harry being able to speak parseltongue and thinking it must be a normal wizard thing

And fun fact: sirens, after they lure sailors, if the ship does not crash into the rocks, the siren will eat every sailor that was on the ship.

Siren's mom's absence seems like they were trying to pull off what happened in the "Barbie in a Mermaid Tale" movie where Merlia's mom was absent from her life because she was trying to protect her, except they left out the part where Merlia's mom was literally imprisoned by her bitchy sister and that's the main reason she couldn't visit. Also Siren's gils were missing after her full transformation, what was up with that?

My kids were watching this movie and I walked in just at the end when she murdered the creepy guy. I yelled, “oh shit what the fuck!?” and scared the crap out of my kids lol.

Siren: "why can't we just have a nice moment? :(" Also Siren: *smiles as she brutally murders a man while all her friends and family watch*

I’ll just put this out there… a kid who only found out they were adopted at 11 would not call the biological mother “real mom” she would just say biological or birth mom… most adopted kids do not like the term real mom including me… it’s something small in the movie but just kinda makes me feel uncomfortable lol

That mortal kombat-esque shot of Jack Grazer's wrist breaking was legitimately incredible.

Not sure why Siren got upset when her mom asked for details on the possible mermaid hunters. She’s the one who brought it up!

I honestly love the stiff mass I'm a sucker for that "good magic comes at a price" trope where the transformation is real ugly and/or painful, and this movie does a pretty good job at that

I feel like this could've been such a good movie about puberty and men's entitlement to women even at such young ages - but when they made the mermaids able to heal people it just kinda ruined it cause now it's really hard to look past that to the other themes present

The only reason we don’t have a cure for corona is because of these damn mermaids being selfish with their blood

I love how mermaids are trying to stay inconspicuous yet they stand in front of places of interest with huge magical shining wands.

To me this seems like a pretty obvious metaphor for how men feel entitled to women's bodies the second they reach puberty and how it is up to women to protect each other, especially young girls. Like I agree it's extremely clumsy but like I do get what they were going for

i love how whenever the mermaids wailed for siren half of them opened their mouths so fast like they forgot when they were supposed to start lip syncing lmaoo

They can literally heal and kill with the same power. They're unstoppable

LOVE the response of the milf mermaid to the creepy man just being "Yeah, that'll be enough of that."

Dad: "Were you throwing rocks at me?" Siren: *lowering her fully cocked throwin' arm* "No, sir. At your window. But I decided against it _before_ you came." *drops rocks* Nailed it.

I think one of the funniest parts of this movie is that Siren literally WAS about to throw the rocks at the window, but she was stopped by Adam’s dad. She didn’t change her mind by herself-she got scared because Adam’s dad caught her about to damage his property. She didn’t decide against not doing it before he came out because she was winding up to throw the actual rocks immediately before she saw him 💀

You know, seeing such a brutal death in a children's film, I'm reminded of this book series. This book series is aimed towards an age range of 8+ (if I remember correctly) and dang there were some graphic things in there. In the first book, a dragon is literally stabbed through the heart by another dragon and shoved down the cliff, and the graphic novel version makes it look a lot more brutal than it is in chapter book form. And wait till you see this death *chuckles* get this, a dragon's own body is forced against his will to cut off his own tongue, rip out his own stomach, and disembowel himself. Mind you he is fully aware while all this is happening, and the book explains the fear in his eyes as he watches his own body pull himself apart. Of course there was other stuff like a dragon's teeth getting pulled out, genocide, a human's head getting bit off, a dragon being tortured an deprived of water until the point of insanity, and the list goes on.

A few points I'd like to make: Sirens are mythical creatures. Some variations are mermaids (the bad kind. They drag people to their deaths in the ocean, drowning them), and the other variations are these people with bird wings, sometimes bird feet, and they also kill people. Siren is the sort of name you have if you are mentally unwell and willing to murder at a moments notice. In any case, both variations sing to lure their prey (humans) to their demise. The second thing I'd like to point out is that the beginning of this movie reminds me of a book I read a while ago, and I can't quite remember the details in it, so I'm not sure. In any case, the book is called "The Tail of Emily Windsnap" which follows a girl named Emily who lives on a boat, really likes water, has a mom who really doesn't like it, and is also a mermaid. If you've read the story more recently than me, please help, because I don't want to read it again just for an analysis! I don't think the whole story lines up, but I wouldn't be surprised if they'd gotten inspiration from it. (the book is much better though) I also have an idea for another movie where Adam is the bird-person kind of siren and that's why his bones were like that, and it turns out the real reason Hunters kill mermaids is because every Hunter once loved a Siren or is a Siren, and the Sirens and Mermaids are at war so Mermaids are killing Sirens and are turning many humans against Mermaids, but Mermaids don't have their own Hunters because it's against their law to fall in love with humans. I could write an AMAZING movie! :D Anyways, I'm gonna use the points you brought up to go write a story! :D

I still can't get over the fact that the mermaids could literally cure cancer by donating a little bit of blood, but they refuse to? They're the real villains here, also Siren didn't even hesitate to brutally murder someone? She wasn't even a little bit concerned after she killed someone? Also how come she only "transformed" for the first time in this movie? Has she never taken a bath before-

the whole conflict of this movie could be so easily solved by just having mermaid-exclusive blood drives like srsly

Siren:... Adam: “I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep”

I love movies like this where it’s clear that the appeal is just immortalizing all those weird high-stakes imaginary games we played as kids, unintentional fridge horror included

Hey Danny, Long time Greg here. I am rewatching your old videos because I love your stuff. I broke up with my girlfriend tonight and that part of “He’s harmless.” “Yeah I fucking doubt it!” Gave me the biggest laugh I’ve had all day. Thank you, Danny.

Parents: We don’t want her to get killed by hunters so we can’t let anyone know about her secret identity Also parents: LeTS nAmE HEr SIREN 🤡

I like how the entire movie could’ve been made irrelevant if sirens just proved their existence and showed their healing blood in a irrefutable way. Boom they’ve gone from hunted to world class healers

The comment section of this video put more thought into this movie than the actual writers did.

i can let every silly detail slide by, but the main thing bothering me: Why is the costume makeup on her gross transforming tail so detailed and realistic but then the actual tail was just a big target costume not even glued down on the waist?? Did they use the entire budget on her transforming feet??? They zoomed in on the fabric wrinkled up at the bottom they didn't even try!!!!

It’s actually so sad. The other mermaids can stay on land, but Siren’s mom is mean and makes her (a killer) leave her friends, adoptive mom, and her education behind.

This movie really makes me appreciate the show h2O, I used to think that show was cringe but now I realize it had like a really good plot to it, and when they turned into mermaids it made sense why they turned into to mermaids you know, and they had pretty cool powers, so this movie really makes me appreciate that masterpiece of a show.😂

My favourite part of this video is that at 23:50 there's no big reverb effect or any audio effects on Danny's reaction, it's just the purest and most realistic "Wha-?" I have ever heard XD Same Danny, same.

I remember watching this movie with my friends and dying of laughter at how stupid it was💀💀💀

Now Danny, don’t you think it’d be pretty weird if a group of doctors walked into a patient’s room and started singing at the top of their lungs then all of sudden the disease is cured. Wouldn’t that expose the existence of mermaids to the public which would put them in infinitely more danger than just a small group of hunters?

“Isn't that like naming your kid murderer?” Well she sure lived up to that name.

I can't believe they named her Siren. If they really wanted to protect her from the Hunters they would have gone all out and named her Mermaid. Then nobody would have ever suspected.

18:19 pause at this part. Okay so, I have studied the human skeletal system before, and if your bones do THIS, you would probably screaming your face of in pain. Usually bones only break in 1 to 5 pieces, BUT HOLY GOAT IS THIS KID OKAY?

“he screams “AHH” and then he’s dead” that got me💀😂

Jack really went from brittle bones disease to a kid named Eddie who fights clowns from space. Come up of the century.

I actually don't think the lore is all that broken, the hunters probably didn't know that a mermaid's healing is a lot more efficient if she's not being stripped of her blood, which is probably just the vessel that carries the healing power through the mermaid's system. The helping people part might have something to do with historical interactions between mermaids and the aforementioned unknowing humans, which probably led to a cultural fear of being open about their powers and identities.

This movie should be called: How mermaids can save the world but don’t want to

the bit where Danny is mocking the main character trying to give herself a pep talk in the mirror had very strong Drew Gooden energy

17:58 something about this scene just fucking kills me every time: -the way the poor kid sounds so desperate -the music is so dramatic -how the mom just ignores the kid/doesn't even seem to realise he's there??? then slams the door in his face -we never see the mom's face in this scene for some reason??? -the completely overdramatic visuals of the bones breaking -the fact he gently places his hand on the door and proceeds to shatter his entire wrist into a thousand pieces, like I know he has brittle bones but my god its so funny oh my god

Imagine the filming in this because the music isn’t actually there so it’s just silent and people are just opening each others mouths while they “wail” at each other but it’s just pure silence and shuffling of feet.

The best part about her name being siren is that sirens don't even resemble mermaids- They have human-like heads and bird-like bodies

i remember watching this movie as a child and being absolutely obsessed it was so bad lmfao 😭

Little did he know that “my bones are getting squishy” would be the best line in cinematic history.

It’s funny to me how people are always like “these mythical creatures are always so cute and nice (generally fairies and mermaids)” when in the actual mythology they’re fucking menaces

Fun fact: Sirens really aren't mermaids, at least not in the classical sense. Sirens in Greek Mythology resemble birds with the heads of women

Danny is extremely funny lol. His jokes and just the tone of his voice makes me laugh lol.

It's so funny having seen the movie several times before seeing this video and seeing how he reacts to all the weird/dumb parts. Though he skipped out on her suffocating at school because she didn't wear her air neck thingy and just a scarf to cover her gills 💀

One day I hope I can thank Danny in person for gifting the Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome community with the phrase “squishy bones” ❤

Why is no one talking about the mother being absent for Siren's whole life, even though she has legs? There was no explanation about any of this

Danny I think you’re forgetting the scene from the old classic ‘Help! I’m a Fish’ where a group of children cause a nasty mutated fish monster to straight up commit suicide. Shit was dark and it’s def got this beat

Siren is SAVAGE. She didn’t even flinch when she murdered the creepy guy!!!

You got me dying 😂😂😂 Danny, I am so happy I ran across you. Life has just gotten a bit brighter with your comedy. I love it.

15:28 I feel like this one might be one of danny's most well executed jokes

Yknow I always used to think siren going “all the time??” When she found about adams condition was really weird and stupid but ever since being diagnosed with a chronic disability. You would not believe how common dumb shit like that is 💀 if I had a dollar for every person who asked *me* if my chronic condition was all the time right after I told them it was all the time, I’d have enough money to remake the scales movie with Danny cast as siren

“Isn’t that kind of like naming a human baby ‘person?’” Well, Guy is a legitimate human name

love how most mermaid movies the mermaid mother just ditches them to humans until there like 13 and then they just come back and there OKAY WITH IT?

This is giving me nostalgia…. This movie used to be my favorite movie as a kid I wanted to be a mermaid so bad and when I turned 12 and didn’t become a mermaid I cried. 💀

As a mermaid, I can confirm that we file our taxes by wailing

It’s like a crossover between a strange fan fiction, one of those American doll role play mermaid things, and a cringey middle school book with that “omg when I go in water I grow a weird skin shaped lump on my legs” plot This scares me 😨 Also not that one line They’re wailing.. each mermaid wail is unique

Fun fact- I remember watching this movie and then I had a panic attack and had to stop watching it 💀✌️

I’m just concerned for Jack Dylan Grazer because all he ever plays is a nerdy kid with a medical issue and I just want to make sure he’s okay

*Mermaids:* We have healing powers that can cure anything in any living organism just by singing while touching the targeted organism. we do not know why hunters hunt us. *Also Mermaids:* LeTs **BEEP** ArOuNd In ThE wAtEr AlL dAnG dAy!

I remember watching this movie with my family and I was cringing so hard😂

So I watch Danny with my mom a lot, she thinks the videos are funny and enjoys them. I was watching this one with her while eating one time, and she, who happens to be a nurse, pointed out that if Adam actually had brittle bones disease, he would not be walking. People with brittle bones have such fragile bodies that even normal movements can hurt them. If this were to be realistic, Adam would probably be in a wheelchair at the least and unable to move at all. He probably wouldn’t even be at a regular school. So not only is it a terrible movie, the writers also don’t know how to properly portray the disease they claim this character suffers from.

Mermaid: *heals child without using blood* Me, seeing Danny’s perplexed face: *STAND BACK, HE’S GONNA BLOW!*

Cant help but feel like the writer just sat back and let his kid write most of the story

*Mermaids: start wailing* Siren: Are they singing? Danny: No, they’re filing their Taxes

The only thing I’m confused about is how did Siren not know this? Has she just not been taking showers her whole entire life? 😃

I have osteogenesis imperfecta too and God you made me laugh about it tho! It sucks but thank you for not being afraid of making fun of it! God the phasing idea made me laugh so hard! "Oh no I'm going squishy!" 😂

I remember watching this movie when I was 10 and freaked out so hard when she was in the tub and experienced her first tail transition or something 😭

I like how they have an even darker version of blood bending in this movie

I just love the part where they are like “you know how I go to a different school every few months and then come back for a few months? Yeah that’s actually me being in the ocean living as a mermaid” that’s the only thing I remember from that movie

danny: "Their blood can heal like diseases and any injuries-" coronavirus: *oh shi*-

After re-watching this a few years later,I think the reason the added grasping effects when siren said she had to go to the bathroom is because the other kids might have though she peed her pants

I watched this movie as a kid and I used to take this movie so seriously until a few years later I watched this movie again and I couldn't take it seriously anymore 💀